To all U hard-working, suped-up-derby-screaming,...

drunker than sin loving, streaker stomping geniuses, this collage is for U! (8/4...7am...NEW PHOTOS...more coming...send 'em if U got 'em, live it up!)

A terrible, heart-wrenching expression of staggering EDITORIAL piety...

In the aftermath of what was by all sane accounts one rowdy ass, crazy as a snarling two-headed MO-FO off its lithium, and storied night last Sunday, we at The Cowboy Picayune-Sunny Times realized that all the dueling words, pointing fingers, bad music, fistcuffs, nasty crack, chipped teeth, and moralizing pieties had somehow marred, upstaged, or failed to capture the wonderful strangenesss, ineffable excitement, joie d'vivre, esprit d'corps, and other fancy-pants- --sounding Latin & French BS of the 2006 Demo Derby.
On behalf of, or in spite of, the opportunistic, sensational-obsessed, negative-seeking, recklessly yellow journalism press, which some dare accuse us of leading the irrelevant pack, we wish to thank all who showed up, clothed, tattooed, boozed-up, sober, wearing plaid, or...otherwise, including the many unsung pit crew Willem Dafoe-looking grease monkeys and ballsy, rodeo pit weekend warriors, non-stop good times flowin' vendors, witty crow's nest gabbers, dazed fair board folks, idiot savant...but mainly idiot freelance hacks, hard-as-spiked

...-nails, caught-on-tape coppers, deputies, one enuff' of the GD paparazzi already Chiefs of all guys who dare you to knock 9-V batteries off their shoulders, an octopus-like naked-guy-nabbing Lady Weber, women, children, mothers, strippers, hookers who love cotton-candy, derby cheerleaders in leather-minis, OH! And even the libelous stay-at-home but still put your two cents in know-it-all-off-a-video, know-nothings...

...THANKS for making HAY out of SHINOLA. And let's not forget all those dogs, cats, rats, ex-cons, exhibitionists, nudists, streakers, carnies,Yoginis, and finally shirtless dudes, coked-up townies, pretty-in-pink babies, unknown silent majority fans, and RADDY-TO-THE MAX rust-bucket reject hot wheels and low-riders who made le 2006 Demo Derby one suped-up, hard-thrashing, boys-to-the-wall, bumping like a blind man in a Bollywood disco whale of a time!

And if we could be granted one final editorial indulgence: Please, please...oh mighty Teton Godfathers and Oddfathers, Don't take our one-of-kind demo derby away! This is still, on a good day, maybe, America damnit-it.

And if it's not...well thank Jesus, God, Buddha, Moses, Chuang-tzu, Lao-tzu, The Zoo, and GeeW then that it's Wyoming! If the Cowboy Equality state can't express itself, and screw-up doing so...

...now and then, just so we can always know where we came from and what are our truly, duly and desirably tolerable limits, then...by damn-it what have we become then? Some sissyfied Connecticut wanna-be blue blood debutante state or some other dangfangled high-brow glad-handing-dandy of a country-clubified kind a place!

--The Cowboy Times

PS: And while we're wringing our hands--and then washing them nasty shopworn thangs before praying mightily to find the wiser angles and higher powers to guide us through this nutty, post-hootenany, navel-gazing through a crystal ball time--let us always remember and never forget: Ladies, Metrosexuals, 90-Day Wonders, Gendarmes, and Gentlemen, who probably weren't there because they were getting their nails done, but will say so anyways, IT'S A FRIGGING DEMO DERBY, not a Ladies Bridge Club over Oolong Tea and Cucumber Sandwiches with those crusty little brown edges trimmed off so neat and real nice, in our fine white gloves and lace hats, with parasols, and those queeny silk stockings and hand-knit cardigans and Boucle roll-neck sweaters wishing we could streak en masse in nana's two-ply circulation socks!

Photos by Gil Brady for The Cowboy Times